g a l l u p t i o u s photobooths blacklights misanthropy cheez-in-a-can people who name their prosthetic leg guys named Ernest sporks platypuses Vanessa's obese dog tea and crumpets addictive RPG games like The Realm potatoes Hector the lego really cute, super-polite old men (awww) Baileys Irish Cream orange juice "Orion" Edinburgh, Scotland ancient-lookin men with big, white beards who yell in Yiddish a lot learing about religion one particular pale horse cornuts televangelists (in an amusing sort-of-way) semicolons guys with hair all the way to their ass Edward Gorey tea (not only is it yummy, it's healthy, too) hyper-text markup language Benihana restaurants deep-dish pizza Buzz watching major surgery anyone who has patterned socks that match their pants or shirt Eddie Izzard night-time when abused animals attack their owners body modification good music Waitresses with lisps that spend 40 minutes "getting a cup of coffee" (what are they doing in that kitchen?!) mushrooms (no, not the drug, the other kind) the BBC receiving long, interesting eMails. my dulcimer (old man included) "sitting around" big words. even when I don't know what they mean. books involving ninja-assassin Catholic monks staplers

d a m n a b l e small children. they look edible. Angelina Jolie anything banana-flavoured men with extremely hairy backs who wear wife-beaters (ewww). the fact I dont have eleven fingers AOL websites that are worse than mine The Leech anyone who acts like they need sedatives constantly Religion and Faith message board Star Wars things that involves math most television receiving pity Macs (burn them all!) allergies people who disrespect other's feelings intentionally strobe lights rap masquerading as metal screaming disguised as music needless conformity people who call my house at two in the morning sunburns. or even tans for that matter. umbrellas borrowing money people who have more body hair than on their head the ninety-one freeway pork being sick. Especially hospital sick. loud people really, really small font (hello, I'm blind!) spinal taps people who write in pink porn advertisements slow computers the fact my "tab" key doesn't function properly carbonated beverages brain meltdowns hot weather Gary the faerie people who have nothing good to say, but never shut up pokémon not getting any sleep for a bunch of days in a row missing Jon seizures Frank the Fudge Smuggler Moral and cultural relativism. ew.